It scares me to raise a boy. I am well aware of sexual perversion and the prevalence of pornography. A young man doesn’t have to work for his porn anymore; it’s readily available by the technological device he holds in his hand. The quick access and numerous public moral fallouts are enough to make Christian women feel as if there is no hope for our children living pure lives.
I sometimes ask men who have admitted their struggle with pornography or sexual addictions how they would advise mothers and fathers to help their children. Almost always, they will talk about limiting the time spent on the computer and internet. But that kind of filter alone is not satisfactory to me. Men were finding ways to look at naked women long before modern technology made it an easy task.
Filtering the Internet is a practical step all parents should take while their kids are under their roofs. But this will not solve the problem for a boy’s lifetime. One day, my son will find a computer without a filter. He may find himself at a friend’s house equipped with every cable channel. He will most definitely walk around town in the midst of women dressed to draw attention. So my son will have to learn to guard his heart first, and his iPhone second. How can he fight such temptation?
Psalm 119:9 “How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Your word.”
While I am happy to have a husband who does and will regularly talk to his children about relational things, I have made a conscious decision as a mother to turn my reasonable paranoia into productive pro-action. I can not prevent 100% of the images my son will see, but I can plant biblical images in my young son’s mind. Today’s humorous image came directly from Proverbs 11:22: “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.”
I asked the kids if a gold ring is pretty, valueable, and desirable. They said yes. Then I asked them what they would think about the ring if it was in a pig snout. My son wrinkled his nose and exclaimed, “Who would want a ring that was up a pig’s nose? It’d have snot and boogers all over it!” (The fact that Jesus would want her, and could clean her up is another discussion for another day.) Here is what he drew as a way to visualize the meaning of the verse:
The circle in the middle is a close-up view of the pig’s nose. You can hardly see the pretty woman in the nostril because she has boogers on her legs and arms, snot for a dress, and she’s covered in mud.
I was a proud mom when my son told me, “When I see a woman not dressed appropriately…. if she doesn’t love Jesus…even if she’s beautiful, I’m gonna say ‘You’re covered in boogers and snot and mud!’”
I’m okay with that. He’s seven now. When he becomes a man and catches a glimpse of the senseless pretty woman, I will stand beside my teen and remind him: “Boogers, son, boogers. Wait for the gold ring covered by the blood of Christ.”